Clarity

It's amazing the clarity that comes from realizing you've been wrong about something all along.

Here are the things I've got going right now:

•  Doing contract work of migrating and redoing some websites, which is something I haven't really done in years but it's going pretty smoothly and I'm knocking it out pretty fast. 
• Trying to get more involved with MAGANRORD again, though to be honest our news from the island is just not that interesting right now. But our radio story is airing on KALW on Monday and our interview in Fader magazine is coming out in next month's issue so the need to keep content fresh and engaging is pressing on us.
• Starting a garden on my roof. This one I'm really excited about. I sooo miss growing things.
• Finishing all these fucking books I've got sitting around half-read.
• Starting a new anatomical-art series.
• Trying to get back into photographing more things. Not for art's sake, just for documenting. It's how I roll.
• The aforementioned writing project about my ridiculous sexual life.
• Tearing up life, turning my world upside down, having awesome times with amazing people, having awesome sex with amazing people, chasing down everything I want to capture, etc, etc...

HIGH FIVE!

Whoever thought...

I would be the poster child for emotional maturity?
I mean, over the past 10 years, I've had a lot of practice, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by it. But when I remember who I was, a lifetime ago it feels like, there's definitely a reason I feel so disconnected from that person.
My emotions have been put to the test so many times this weekend and every time I couldn't be more pleased with how things have turned out.
Knowing is always just the missing piece of the puzzle.

Songs for the morning:

Ion Square, Bloc Party. "I love my mind when I'm fucking you":


For Real, Okkervil River. "I really miss what really did exist when I held your throat so tight":


Pace is the Trick, Interpol. "You were known for insatiable needs. I don't know a thing":

Snippet, Take 1

The beautiful amazing boy I spoke about in the last post, post fucking me for the first time, started laughing. I asked him why he was laughing, and he explained that I was too much and couldn't be real, and then asked me where the hell I came from. He decided that it must be "Mars-achusetts".

So let's try this again.

I'm sort of recommitting myself to being involved in things again. Which I know is sort of a nebulous statement, but I know what I mean and that's all that really matters. I need more projects basically. I have a few, which I'm into, but the more narrow my field of vision the quicker I get burned out and bored with things. So I'm gonna spread myself thin because that's what I'm into. So here's some of that:

Just painted this last Saturday, when I was feeling inspired after a day spent with someone who I'm finding more and more to be someone I really want to keep in my life. So you know, maybe it was also in an attempt to distract myself from freaking out about that. Ha. Anyway, it started out as an albatross but morphed into a frigatebird because they just have way cooler tails. It's over six feet, took me over twice as long as any of my other birds, and completely ruined my knees. I pretty much love it, but it still shocks me a little when I see it out of the corner of my eye.

I've also started writing about moments in my current sexual/dating life that have struck me as amusing/ridiculous/meaningful/magical whatever. I've been thinking about putting them up on here, but maybe I'll start a new blog for that. I don't know. I had a moment that was just so chock full of coincidence and significance and just felt like something out of a movie I would make, that I had to write about it. And it's grown from there. So I guess stay tuned on that.

Logan and I got interviewed by Fader magazine about MAGANRORD. It's going to be in the August issue. It's weird to feel accomplished and successful. Those are things I've always avoided. Maybe the older I get the more ambitious I become.

In boring mundane news about my life, today I had to deal with the fact that something is actually over with someone I'd been seeing for a while. And it kind of sucks. And I also got a lovely email from someone I had an intense but short-lived fling with last summer, and he is fucking beautiful and awesome so that was really awesome. And then I got some more emails, from other awesome, beautiful people. And my life goes on.

Amusing the fuck out of myself, always.

(9:43:48 PM) Chris: i wanna go see inception
(9:43:55 PM) Marie: yeah i kinda do too
(9:44:09 PM) Marie: i mean cillian murphy and joseph gordon levitt in the same movie?
(9:44:17 PM) Marie: someone has been reading my private slashfic
(9:44:46 PM) Chris: gay
(9:44:52 PM) Marie: exactly

I like

that a post I have, which contains no links to mp3s or anything else for that matter, just song names and descriptions, keeps getting deleted by blogger because of DMCA complaints they're getting. WTG.

Yo Ho Ho!!

Fedora!

Suuuunburn!

Nick Cave with the Cavemen-Mutiny in heaven

Marry me, Mr. Cave.

Maganrord is going to be on the radio...

So last Tuesday, this great public radio reporter Molly Samuel came out to the island to interview Logan, Danielle, and me about Maganrord. We had a great 3-4 hours showing her around the island, talking about birding and the blog and our jobs and all sorts of other stuff. She's currently in the process of putting it all together to make a radio story that should air on public radio in SF sometime within the next few weeks. I'll keep you updated once I know more about that.

During the interview we actually saw the juvenile raven for the first time, saw the raven parents predating eggs from the black crowned night heron colony, and saw some very small juvenile black crowned night herons (also a first for us). Logan put together a great post over at Maganrord about a few of those things, so check that out.

Look what I just got for Mother's Day!

Yep.

Totally apropos song of the day:

"Our Life is Not a Movie or Maybe" - Okkervil River

Birthday, &c

So I turned 29 on Thursday. Strange to have had the last birthday of my twenties. But we had a party at bingo, and I got to call bingo, and it was super fun and awesome. Check this shit:

Yay. Check the rest of the pictures here.

In other news the Bay Area is proving to be entirely too small for my dating ideals. Hilariously enough, Chris and I found out that he's seeing a girl who is seeing a guy that I've been seeing. Kinda sucks, too many complications, so I had to end things with the guy, since I have the least amount of feelings involved and I guess am just better at shit like this. So it goes.

Now I've gotta go find that spark to make this thing explode. It's time.

True Norwegian Black Metal

Watched this earlier tonight and it was awesome. For those who don't know, I totally love documentaries about weird subcultures, and Black Metal is a particular favorite subject of these for me. This one is actually pretty interesting, beyond the "WTF" factor and paints a pretty complex picture of its subject. Also, Gaahl's hometown, if you can even call it a town, is amazingly beautiful. Talk about secluded.
Wikipedia link for Espedal, Norway.
Apparently the place is named for his family and they're the only ones who live there..
Google Maps link. Basically looks like it's in the middle of nowhere.

The Wikipedia entry on Gaahl is fascinating. Apparently he's gay and recently out, as well as a vegetarian. Those seem like Black Metal firsts. Ha.

"Runaway"

All about this song tonight.

A little bit of a hiatus...

As you may have noticed, I've been pretty lax in posting updates to this blog. I've been a bit busy with the other blogs I work on, as well as being sick, and I've been dealing with a couple of life-altering realizations. I swear it's not as dire as it sounds, and I'll still post quick little things here I'm sure, but for the time being don't get your hopes up for awesomeness. Or, if you need your Marie fix, check out The BoneZone or my twitter both of which I update often.

TJ Maxx wants to put me out of a job

My newest musical obsession: Great Lake Swimmers

Gorgeous.

Canada is kicking serious ass in the moody/folky/alt-country department. See also: Evening Hymns