PrimaLux

www.mariecerda.com

2010-11-20T14:54:00.001-08:00

I've moved my blog over to my own host and have a new domain. You can now find me at www.mariecerda.com.

RAWR.

2010-10-29T15:06:00.000-07:00

So in a week I will be on a plane to Costa Rica. Shit yes. This has been taking up a majority of my time lately, but I think everything is taken care of at this point, so now I just get to be busy with all of the other fucking things I have going on. Ha.

I'm working on a redesign for MAGANRORD since we're getting a bunch more attention these days. This awesome journalist, Matt Baume, came out and let Logan and me show him around and talk about birds for his piece about the three main islands in the bay. Check it out. He's also been giving us some love/links in other articles of his on various sites, so it's pretty damn awesome. We've gotta keep the momentum going.

I'm also super busy/stressed trying to plan for school. So much shit needs to be done before I even register for classes and I have all of these meetings I have to go to for course planning and transferring and financial aid and such. I'm just trying to get this shit done, and if that means being mad focused and hectic then so be it.

That's sort of just scratching the surface of all I have going on, but really, who wants to hear me bitch about projects and commitments and such? Let's just say, updates here have been lacking for a reason. However, I hope to have a giant one full of a billion pictures of birds and nature and tropical paradise in a couple of weeks. So stay tuned.

Bird Nerd to the max:

2010-10-16T09:36:00.001-07:00

My species list for yesterday:
1. Red Tailed Hawk
2. Red Shouldered Hawk
3. Brandt's Cormorant
4. Double Crested Cormorant
5. Brown Pelican
6. Western Gull
7. Ring Billed Gull
8. Snowy Egret
9. Great Egret
10. Black Bellied Plover
11. Unknown Species of tiny, tiny Plover
12. Unknown Species of medium-sized Sandpiper
13. Killdeer
14. American Coot
15. Unknown species of Tern
16. Crow
17. Common Raven
18. Black Crowned Night Heron
19. Mallard
20. Tons of little tiny songbirds that I have no idea about

Not bad for hanging out at a coastal pond for half an hour.

Best. Conversation. Ever. (also the most surreal)

2010-10-05T21:24:00.000-07:00

(9:12:37 PM) Marie: i all of a sudden became an adult with like...aspirations and shit
(9:12:46 PM) Marie: ambition and motivation and all of that jazz
(9:12:49 PM) Marie: it's fucking weird
(9:12:56 PM) Charles: thats not adult
(9:13:03 PM) Charles: thats white kid bullshit
(9:13:04 PM) Marie: haha
(9:13:11 PM) Marie: no way
(9:13:16 PM) Marie: white kids are jaded little fucks
(9:13:40 PM) Marie: who think that cynicism equals authenticity
(9:13:45 PM) Charles: hey!
(9:13:51 PM) Charles: GETTING CLOSE TO HOME
(9:13:59 PM) Marie: YOU RESEMBLE THAT STATEMENT
(9:13:59 PM) Marie: ha
(9:14:15 PM) Charles: I've been an adult for far to long
(9:14:24 PM) Marie: yeah you have
(9:14:26 PM) Charles: almost as much as I've been rebelling from it
(9:14:30 PM) Marie: i'm not gonna be that kind of adult
(9:14:33 PM) Marie: i don't ever want a car
(9:14:34 PM) Marie: haha
(9:14:44 PM) Charles: the tattooed world traveler kind?
(9:14:47 PM) Marie: i just wanna go run around and study anipals
(9:14:49 PM) Charles: wait, I rule
(9:15:03 PM) Marie: and eventually settle down in a northern european country
(9:15:10 PM) Charles: Finland
(9:15:14 PM) Marie: that would be awesome
(9:15:20 PM) Marie: anywhere with good social services really
(9:15:23 PM) Marie: and awesome art
(9:15:27 PM) Marie: music etc
(9:15:29 PM) Marie: and good nature
(9:15:36 PM) Charles: you're going to end up knocked up by a viking
(9:15:42 PM) Marie: haha i think i'd be ok with that
(9:15:55 PM) Charles: I'm sure
(9:16:46 PM) Marie: I've been talking to a lot of visitors at work and I swear, the happiest ones, the ones that never seemed stressed or like assholes are always from like denmark or finland or sweden or the netherlands
(9:16:57 PM) Marie: even the germans seem pretty chill compared to americans
(9:17:54 PM) Charles: dude
(9:18:00 PM) Charles: I think I have to take a shit
(9:18:05 PM) Charles: because of you
(9:18:09 PM) Marie: exciting
(9:18:10 PM) Charles: you make me shit
(9:18:10 PM) Marie: haha
(9:18:35 PM) Charles: you know I get the trots when hippies are around
(9:18:40 PM) Marie: hahahaha
(9:18:56 PM) Charles: no but really
(9:18:58 PM) Charles: good, go
(9:19:01 PM) Charles: be happy
(9:19:04 PM) Marie: I will
(9:19:05 PM) Charles: fuck a iceman
(9:19:07 PM) Marie: haha
(9:19:10 PM) Charles: it'll be grand
(9:19:11 PM) Marie: it's like a 10 year plan
(9:19:14 PM) Charles: make me the god father
(9:19:20 PM) Marie: dude I will
(9:19:26 PM) Charles: but don't leave that nord to me
(9:19:33 PM) Charles: or I'll make it so fucking metal
(9:19:47 PM) Charles: it'll shit hippies and burn down churches
(9:19:50 PM) Marie: and I'll name my kid Bas in honor of my long lost viking bff
(9:19:54 PM) Charles: yeah
(9:20:31 PM) Marie: haha
(9:20:34 PM) Marie: hilarious
(9:20:42 PM) Marie: you can teach my kid to burn down churches
(9:20:44 PM) Marie: i'm chill with that
(9:20:55 PM) Marie: i've seen like every black metal documentary that exists
(9:20:59 PM) Marie: those guys are pretty cool
(9:24:55 PM) Charles: maries gonna have babies
(9:25:06 PM) Marie: hahaha
(9:25:09 PM) Marie: tiny vikings
(9:25:20 PM) Charles: they'll end up like toki
(9:25:24 PM) Charles: kinda pussy
(9:25:32 PM) Charles: but still cool
(9:25:34 PM) Marie: hahaha

Pardon my lack of recent updates

2010-09-12T09:49:00.000-07:00

but you know, life has been taking place. In ALL SORTS of ways.

First off let me just say that the trip to San Diego was an unexpected and well-needed vacation. I really found something down there and every moment of it, even the sad ones, was a true fucking delight. I feel like my head is finally where it needs to be, not just for the moment, but for my life and for whatever the future is going to bring my way. I had amazing times alone, amazing times with some of the closest people in the world to me, and amazing times reconnecting with old friends that I was very happy to see. If you'd like, the pictures are here.

The garden is kicking ass, though it's still existing in the front part of my room for the time being. We've had sporadically hot and sunny weather lately, and I don't want my little shade loving seedlings to burn.

As for everything else, let's just say that transition is the word of the day. Or week, month, whatever. So many things seem to be changing right now, which I absolutely welcome. I mean most of the changes are my doing, but I guess the spark that set the change in action was this new feeling of motivation and ambition and drive that I've really never known. I'm through just coasting through life. Don't get me wrong, it was fantastic and fun and necessary and I don't regret any of it, but now it's time to do something else. I'm not really leaving Neverland, I'm just like...moving on to Neverland University or something. I'm actually making plans, big ones even, and really trying to put thought into my life now. It's an interesting ride, for sure.

I'm also really opening myself up to emotions again. Not like they were ever gone, but I'd gotten to a point where I had such a grip on them that I could basically decide what I wanted to feel and what I didn't want to feel. So let's see where letting go gets me. I do this every once in a while, and I remember how much better it is and how much more alive I feel, and then something comes along and hurts me and fucks it all up and I go back to the "robot" so to speak. What I'm getting at here is it's scary AS FUCK. But I'm enjoying the scary, the uncertainty, the intensity, the tiny moments of panic, just as much as I'm enjoying all the better warm fuzzy things. It's very much like the old "shedding skin" cliche. Everything is still raw and sensitive and shocking. Though knowing the way my emotions roll, maybe they always will be. It's all alright. A lifetime's worth of experience in being me knows that it will always be alright.

Everything there ever was, and will be, is all there is.

2010-08-21T22:29:00.001-07:00

So despite all of my promises of never going back to San Diego, I will be doing just that this coming Wednesday. Sadly someone I was very close to in high school passed away and although he and I were no longer close it's left me in a strange place mentally, as it's also done to many people I love.

It's been a strange past 48 hours. I'm so stuck in my head right now. I feel so amazingly connected to a time in my past that I've done my damndest to sever all connections with. Those years were so important and so formitive but so fucking painful. And now it's all so damn raw and on the surface of every thought I have and every action I make. I'm not that person anymore, I'm not trying to be, but I realize that she still lives inside of me somewhere.

I'm trying to focus on what's good and present and real and alive right now: I have amazing friends both here and there who love me and I love them. There's a guy out there with the same color toenails as me and spending time with him makes me pretty damn happy. I get to spend 4 days with my best friend and do nothing but lie on a beach in the sun and be a little emo and get a sunburn. And strangest of all, being this aware and this connected to my emotions has made me feel alive in a completely remarkable way.

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Word to the wise:

2010-08-17T22:53:00.001-07:00

Resourceful and decisive are two things that EVERYONE should learn how to be.

Garden, Day 5: The Sproutening!

2010-08-11T08:44:00.000-07:00

The mache is the only thing that hasn't sprouted, but it takes quite a bit longer.

God, I LOVE growing things.

More Food: Lunch, Quinoa Pilaf

2010-08-07T15:26:00.001-07:00

Quinoa Pilaf, originally uploaded by primalux.

Saute shallots, mushrooms, and peppers in olive oil. Add greens (I used collards, arugula, some other spring baby greens) and edamame. Salt. Add cooked quinoa, I cook mine with beef or mushroom stock to really amp up the umami. Finish with a good white wine vinegar. Trust on this last step. The acid does it. I CRAVE this dish constantly.

More Food: Breakfast

2010-08-07T15:23:00.001-07:00

Breakfast, originally uploaded by primalux.

Crostini with goat cheese and fresh basil. Topped with sauteed mushrooms, tomatoes, and orange bell peppers. Poached eggs on top of that.

The Bitter and Sick and Die Alones - Hurt is all I get (Live at Atalante)

2010-08-07T10:09:00.000-07:00

This song takes my breath away. So amazing. So beautiful.

Best Salad Ever

2010-08-06T22:03:00.001-07:00

Best Salad Ever, originally uploaded by primalux.

My dinner tonight: spring greens, romaine, purple cabbage, carrots, orange bell pepper, cucumber, tomato, edamame. Dressed in olive oil, seasoned rice vinegar, smoked sea salt, freshly ground pepper.

With a Greyhound to drink.

The garden is a go:

2010-08-06T17:20:00.000-07:00

More pictures here.

So I'm growing spearmint and basil, which are the two actual plants in the pictures, as well as mustard greens, collard greens, broccoli rabe, mache, and kale. I also bought seeds to grow sprouts, alfalfa and mung bean.

And now I wait. And try to learn that thing called "patience".

New Mix

2010-08-03T01:51:00.001-07:00

Random Thought

2010-08-03T01:23:00.001-07:00

This has occurred to me twice today so it probably means something a little more real than random: I much prefer dating intelligent, knowledgeable men with no real formal education to guys who learned everything they know, including the ways they think and process, because they went to school and got a degree. There's a lack of structure in the former that I find so much more interesting and intriguing. And, let's be honest, more authentic.

Tallest Man on Earth

2010-08-02T22:43:00.000-07:00

Dear Sweden,
Please keep making beautiful men who make creative, honest, amazing music and I will carry your torch FOREVER.
Love, Marie
P.S. Tallest Man on Earth is playing the Fillmore in September. WHO WANTS TO GO??

Ugh. Stop it. You're perfect.

2010-08-02T20:56:00.000-07:00

My last three meals.

2010-08-01T10:18:00.000-07:00

Most recent up top. Click through to flickr for descriptions and ingredients.

Le. Sigh.

2010-08-01T09:29:00.001-07:00

Beautiful amazing boy from last summer emailed me again. He's still on the other side of the world but every time I hear from him I swoon just a touch. He's a little bit of magic.

Garden Planning

2010-08-01T09:23:00.001-07:00

I am so excited about having a garden again, I can't even tell you guys. I live in basically THE foggy, cold neighborhood of San Francisco, which normally I like to bitch about. The rest of the city will have sun and a degree of warmth but my house and my park are just grey and cold. I'm finding it pretty serendipitous that the exact things I'm interested in growing, lots of greens primarily, actually prefer this weather. This makes me a happy lady. I'm going to be growing some herbs too, but I think I'll just keep those inside in front of my bay window, which faces west. The only sun we often get here is in the late afternoon, so this will allow them to take full advantage of that.
This morning has just been all research, research, research. When I finish this coffee I'm gonna take a break and make myself something delicious to eat. Then it's off to work. YAY BUSY LIFE.

My newest mix:

2010-07-31T18:55:00.001-07:00

Update: Track Listing for those who requested it.

Bat For Lashes - I Saw a Light
Einstürzende Neubauten - Blume (French Version)
PJ Harvey - Oh My Lover
Okkervil River - For Real
Fever Ray - If I Had a Heart
Tom Waits - Alice
Bonnie "Prince" Billy - Strange Form of Life
Einstürzende Neubauten - Blume (English Version)
Interpol - Leif Erikson

The sun

2010-07-31T16:40:00.000-07:00

came out while I was walking home from the market with bushels of fresh basil and mint. It was perfect. I was listening to "Runaway" by The National. I'm drinking wine and making a new mixtape right now, which I will post later. Next weekend is officially "Start the Garden" weekend. I've also decided that I love the act of alchemy that is cooking way too much and I need to get back to my roots, so I'm only going to eat out now if it's an actual quality food experience. I went out to Alembic last Wednesday with the biologist and it was a superb and fucking transcendent food and whiskey experience, and that's really the only time it's worth it. Otherwise it's gonna be me here in my kitchen, transforming one thing into another. I wish my place was more conducive to dinner parties. I miss having those. Maybe I'll have them anyway.

Last night Logan and Danielle hosted a "Jersey Shore Season 2 Premiere" party and it was awesome. Vegan sausage and peppers, the fruity drink concoction that is "Ron Ron Juice", and even a hot tub. Great times. I looked like a total Jersey stripper. Witness:

Head on over here to see the rest of my shitty cameraphone pics of the party.

RAWR!

2010-07-30T14:58:00.000-07:00

I feel like I am chewing up and spitting out the entire world right now. It's fucking stellar.
I need more creative people in my life. I want some real partners in crime.

Snippet, Take 2

2010-07-27T20:23:00.000-07:00

This song will forever remind me of a specific night almost a year ago. I went on a date I was really not excited about going on, I showed up a little bit tipsy cause I had beer for dinner, I immediately liked him upon meeting him, and by the end of the night I was taking him to my place which I rarely do (I usually opt for their place. Easier to escape and then they don't know where I live). We fucked, it was awesome. I put this album, which I had just gotten, on beforehand. We fell asleep. I woke up in the middle of the night and heard this song for the first time. It was perfect. Perfect for that guy, perfect for that night, all of it. Especially lying there, in the middle of the night, with a stranger who was one of the first people I'd ever felt disarmed by. Glow from the laptop, the line "we are capsules of energy". And then I never saw him again. But every single time I heard this song I flashed back to that night, and to him, and to that moment.
And somehow he's now back in my life.

Skin

2010-07-27T00:46:00.000-07:00

I'm a sucker for scratches. Ha. And anatomy.NSFW. Via Unscathed Corpse

This.This a fucking million times.

2010-07-26T23:49:00.000-07:00

Radio Interview!

2010-07-26T12:54:00.001-07:00

A while back I mentioned that we were interviewed about our Alcatraz bird blog MAGANRORD. Well that interview is finally airing tonight! The show is CrossCurrents on KALW. If you're in the bay area the station is 91.7 and it will also be on the web at kalwnews.org. It airs between 5 and 530 pm. Listen to our awesomeness!

Clarity

2010-07-25T09:43:00.000-07:00

It's amazing the clarity that comes from realizing you've been wrong about something all along.

Here are the things I've got going right now:

Doing contract work of migrating and redoing some websites, which is something I haven't really done in years but it's going pretty smoothly and I'm knocking it out pretty fast.
Trying to get more involved with MAGANRORD again, though to be honest our news from the island is just not that interesting right now. But our radio story is airing on KALW on Monday and our interview in Fader magazine is coming out in next month's issue so the need to keep content fresh and engaging is pressing on us.
Starting a garden on my roof. This one I'm really excited about. I sooo miss growing things.
Finishing all these fucking books I've got sitting around half-read.
Starting a new anatomical-art series.
Trying to get back into photographing more things. Not for art's sake, just for documenting. It's how I roll.
The aforementioned writing project about my ridiculous sexual life.
Tearing up life, turning my world upside down, having awesome times with amazing people, having awesome sex with amazing people, chasing down everything I want to capture, etc, etc...

HIGH FIVE!

Whoever thought...

2010-07-24T13:45:00.000-07:00

I would be the poster child for emotional maturity?
I mean, over the past 10 years, I've had a lot of practice, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by it. But when I remember who I was, a lifetime ago it feels like, there's definitely a reason I feel so disconnected from that person.
My emotions have been put to the test so many times this weekend and every time I couldn't be more pleased with how things have turned out.
Knowing is always just the missing piece of the puzzle.

Songs for the morning:

2010-07-20T09:14:00.000-07:00

Ion Square, Bloc Party. "I love my mind when I'm fucking you":

For Real, Okkervil River. "I really miss what really did exist when I held your throat so tight":

Pace is the Trick, Interpol. "You were known for insatiable needs. I don't know a thing":

Snippet, Take 1

2010-07-20T00:32:00.000-07:00

The beautiful amazing boy I spoke about in the last post, post fucking me for the first time, started laughing. I asked him why he was laughing, and he explained that I was too much and couldn't be real, and then asked me where the hell I came from. He decided that it must be "Mars-achusetts".

So let's try this again.

2010-07-19T21:36:00.000-07:00

I'm sort of recommitting myself to being involved in things again. Which I know is sort of a nebulous statement, but I know what I mean and that's all that really matters. I need more projects basically. I have a few, which I'm into, but the more narrow my field of vision the quicker I get burned out and bored with things. So I'm gonna spread myself thin because that's what I'm into. So here's some of that:

Just painted this last Saturday, when I was feeling inspired after a day spent with someone who I'm finding more and more to be someone I really want to keep in my life. So you know, maybe it was also in an attempt to distract myself from freaking out about that. Ha. Anyway, it started out as an albatross but morphed into a frigatebird because they just have way cooler tails. It's over six feet, took me over twice as long as any of my other birds, and completely ruined my knees. I pretty much love it, but it still shocks me a little when I see it out of the corner of my eye.

I've also started writing about moments in my current sexual/dating life that have struck me as amusing/ridiculous/meaningful/magical whatever. I've been thinking about putting them up on here, but maybe I'll start a new blog for that. I don't know. I had a moment that was just so chock full of coincidence and significance and just felt like something out of a movie I would make, that I had to write about it. And it's grown from there. So I guess stay tuned on that.

Logan and I got interviewed by Fader magazine about MAGANRORD. It's going to be in the August issue. It's weird to feel accomplished and successful. Those are things I've always avoided. Maybe the older I get the more ambitious I become.

In boring mundane news about my life, today I had to deal with the fact that something is actually over with someone I'd been seeing for a while. And it kind of sucks. And I also got a lovely email from someone I had an intense but short-lived fling with last summer, and he is fucking beautiful and awesome so that was really awesome. And then I got some more emails, from other awesome, beautiful people. And my life goes on.

Amusing the fuck out of myself, always.

2010-07-18T21:45:00.001-07:00

(9:43:48 PM) Chris: i wanna go see inception
(9:43:55 PM) Marie: yeah i kinda do too
(9:44:09 PM) Marie: i mean cillian murphy and joseph gordon levitt in the same movie?
(9:44:17 PM) Marie: someone has been reading my private slashfic
(9:44:46 PM) Chris: gay
(9:44:52 PM) Marie: exactly

I like

2010-06-25T09:19:00.001-07:00

that a post I have, which contains no links to mp3s or anything else for that matter, just song names and descriptions, keeps getting deleted by blogger because of DMCA complaints they're getting. WTG.

Yo Ho Ho!!

2010-06-14T21:21:00.000-07:00

Fedora!

2010-06-12T15:24:00.000-07:00

Suuuunburn!

2010-06-12T14:47:00.000-07:00

Nick Cave with the Cavemen-Mutiny in heaven

2010-06-07T22:30:00.000-07:00

Marry me, Mr. Cave.

Maganrord is going to be on the radio...

2010-05-22T10:13:00.000-07:00

So last Tuesday, this great public radio reporter Molly Samuel came out to the island to interview Logan, Danielle, and me about Maganrord. We had a great 3-4 hours showing her around the island, talking about birding and the blog and our jobs and all sorts of other stuff. She's currently in the process of putting it all together to make a radio story that should air on public radio in SF sometime within the next few weeks. I'll keep you updated once I know more about that.

During the interview we actually saw the juvenile raven for the first time, saw the raven parents predating eggs from the black crowned night heron colony, and saw some very small juvenile black crowned night herons (also a first for us). Logan put together a great post over at Maganrord about a few of those things, so check that out.

Look what I just got for Mother's Day!

2010-05-09T10:49:00.001-07:00

Yep.

Totally apropos song of the day:

2010-05-08T13:49:00.000-07:00

"Our Life is Not a Movie or Maybe" - Okkervil River

Birthday, &c

2010-05-08T12:37:00.000-07:00

So I turned 29 on Thursday. Strange to have had the last birthday of my twenties. But we had a party at bingo, and I got to call bingo, and it was super fun and awesome. Check this shit:

Yay. Check the rest of the pictures here.

In other news the Bay Area is proving to be entirely too small for my dating ideals. Hilariously enough, Chris and I found out that he's seeing a girl who is seeing a guy that I've been seeing. Kinda sucks, too many complications, so I had to end things with the guy, since I have the least amount of feelings involved and I guess am just better at shit like this. So it goes.

Now I've gotta go find that spark to make this thing explode. It's time.

True Norwegian Black Metal

2010-04-25T00:51:00.000-07:00

Watched this earlier tonight and it was awesome. For those who don't know, I totally love documentaries about weird subcultures, and Black Metal is a particular favorite subject of these for me. This one is actually pretty interesting, beyond the "WTF" factor and paints a pretty complex picture of its subject. Also, Gaahl's hometown, if you can even call it a town, is amazingly beautiful. Talk about secluded.
Wikipedia link for Espedal, Norway.
Apparently the place is named for his family and they're the only ones who live there..
Google Maps link. Basically looks like it's in the middle of nowhere.

The Wikipedia entry on Gaahl is fascinating. Apparently he's gay and recently out, as well as a vegetarian. Those seem like Black Metal firsts. Ha.

"Runaway"

2010-04-25T00:43:00.000-07:00

All about this song tonight.

A little bit of a hiatus...

2010-04-19T19:52:00.001-07:00

As you may have noticed, I've been pretty lax in posting updates to this blog. I've been a bit busy with the other blogs I work on, as well as being sick, and I've been dealing with a couple of life-altering realizations. I swear it's not as dire as it sounds, and I'll still post quick little things here I'm sure, but for the time being don't get your hopes up for awesomeness. Or, if you need your Marie fix, check out The BoneZone or my twitter both of which I update often.

TJ Maxx wants to put me out of a job

2010-04-11T12:06:00.000-07:00

My newest musical obsession: Great Lake Swimmers

2010-04-05T23:27:00.000-07:00

Gorgeous.

Canada is kicking serious ass in the moody/folky/alt-country department. See also: Evening Hymns

Maybe I am a "challenge" after all...

2010-03-30T22:10:00.000-07:00

(9:55:08 PM) Micah: is that enough to convince even you, to keep your clothes on?
(9:55:26 PM) Marie: nothing has ever convinced me to keep my clothes on
(9:55:30 PM) Marie: that would take a literal act of god
(9:55:52 PM) Micah: i feel like you just gave me the challenge of my life
(9:56:13 PM) Micah: to achieve what even god himself could not
(9:56:38 PM) Micah: I WILL USE DUCT TAPE IF I HAVE TO
(9:56:42 PM) Micah: which i know you'll like....
(9:56:58 PM) Marie: hahaha and thus it would defeat the purpose

Hey guys,

2010-03-28T11:50:00.000-07:00

How's it going? I'm doing well, thanks for asking.

However, there is something weighing on my mind. Guys, I think I'm eff-ing a puma. Not like the hot older lady variety, but like an actual jungle cat.

Evidence:

Also I woke up this morning at a random persons house in Oakland with very little recollection of how I got there. How is this my life? Ha.

SWOON. SIGH. ♥

2010-03-26T22:25:00.001-07:00

Music Matters - Nick Cave (23-3-10) from Music Matters on Vimeo.

Working Hard at Hardly Working

2010-03-26T17:21:00.000-07:00

A day in the life of Logan and Marie, Alcatraz kiosk staff extraordinaire:

Yep, you're jealous.

My friends slay me...

2010-03-23T22:50:00.000-07:00

(10:46:06 PM) Marie: i see
(10:46:11 PM) Marie: maybe i am a sociopath
(10:46:12 PM) Marie: ha
(10:46:36 PM) Micah: heheh
(10:46:56 PM) Micah: it wouldn't be the weirdest thing about you :)
(10:47:03 PM) Marie: haha it's true
(10:47:18 PM) Marie: but i mean i cried IN PUBLIC about the andrew crap
(10:47:22 PM) Marie: so i must have some feelings
(10:47:23 PM) Marie: ha
(10:47:25 PM) Micah: i know!!!!!!!
(10:47:39 PM) Micah: it was like watching an android malfunction

Quote of yesterday

2010-03-22T12:52:00.001-07:00

"Ok Mr. " I like to do child abuse"-six year old to his father.
Overheard by Logan on the island.

Quote of the day:

2010-03-20T15:03:00.000-07:00

"I don't get why being a dude and liking dudes means your wrist breaks, you sound like a snake, you wear fashion tank tops, you walk funny, and become segregated. What does any of that have to do with enjoying a wiener in your mouth?"

-Garrett, just now, via text.

More pictures

2010-03-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

from Garrett's visit, taken by people other than me. Thanks facebook! Ha.

Pretty sure we were singing "Umbrella". No joke.

Drrrruuuuunk at Robin's karaoke party.

Taken at Robin's after drinking a scorpion bowl at Trad'r Sams, three pitchers of margaritas at Tommy's, smoking some pot, and eating a pot brownie. Yeah, this is what happens when SD comes to SF.

Drinking a scorpion bowl makes Garrett look creepy apparently.

Together forever!

"Mi Amor"

Check out our awesome cards!

2010-03-15T16:27:00.000-07:00

Danielle made them. They rule.

OH MY GOD WE ARE SO HOT

2010-03-13T12:43:00.000-08:00

Modest too.

you just haven't earned it yet baby...

2010-03-10T00:41:00.001-08:00

Man I'm bringing it way back with this one. I haven't heard this song since high school but I've been thinking about and dealing with this situation that's been occupying my life for the past 4 months. It's gotten to the point that every time I'm trying to respond to something this is what pops in my head. Fucking hilarious.

Tonights Episode of "I wish I was eating at Marie's house":

2010-03-09T20:29:00.000-08:00

Vegetarian Stroganoff

I bought some amazing "village style" Russian sour cream at the market yesterday, so I was trying to create a recipe with it.
The other stuff:
Chinese Eggplant, which I prefer to regular eggplant because it contains far less water and retains so much firmness when cooked, even without salting it prior to cooking.
Spinach, because I'm always eating for my anemia. Iron, bitches.
Green Peas, see above. Decent source of iron, and of vitamin C which aids in iron absorption.

Lacking egg noodles, I went for a medium width linguine. All in all, fucking awesome.

Thai Pepper

2010-03-07T18:28:00.001-08:00

Thai Pepper, originally uploaded by primalux.

I had this sitting on my tongue for about 5 seconds total. My lips are numb and my tongue is burning 5 minutes later.

Ladies and Gentlemen, my ex-boyfriend

2010-03-07T18:15:00.001-08:00

(3/7/2010 6:13:20 PM) Marie: dark and stormy!
(6:13:25 PM) Chris: aha
(6:13:26 PM) Marie: LIKE THE WEATHER
(6:13:28 PM) Chris: you alright there?
(6:13:30 PM) Chris: what?
(6:13:30 PM) Marie: but in my MOUTH
(6:13:33 PM) Chris: you are crazy
(6:13:35 PM) Marie: haha
(6:13:40 PM) Marie: i've been stupid happy all day
(6:13:44 PM) Marie: no idea why
(6:13:51 PM) Chris: sounds like a troubled black man cumming in your mouth
(6:13:55 PM) Marie: hahaha

The Best Gift Ever

2010-03-06T12:59:00.001-08:00

The Best Gift Ever, originally uploaded by primalux.

Area Reserved (Please See Host)

2010-03-06T12:40:00.000-08:00

I went out with a rad boy in Oakland last night. Yes, the sign is shoved down my cleavage. And of course, we totally stole it. I should hang it above my bed. Ha.

I know the kindest face with a sailor's eyes, still can't be trusted...

2010-03-01T21:06:00.001-08:00

JM, you are a muse

Best. Thing. Ever.

2010-02-28T23:14:00.001-08:00

Nick Cave. Shane McGowan. I Put a Spell on You.

Bourbonhawk: Bird Detective

2010-02-27T14:28:00.000-08:00

Logan took some awesome snaps of me at work:

For those not in the know, Bourbonhawk is my MAGANRORD alias.

Ryan Adams at Austin City Limits- To Be Young

2010-02-26T13:25:00.001-08:00

Great, great song. Ryan is funny as fuck. LOVE.

Quote of the day:

2010-02-26T11:44:00.001-08:00

Chris: "if you get any more jerz up in your vag we're going to have to give it a 609 area code"

It's so true.

Yeah, I've got flair...

2010-02-24T10:45:00.000-08:00

Quote of the night:

2010-02-23T23:03:00.001-08:00

"You know what I want babe? Cool guys like you out of my life"

Nothing makes me feel as good as Heathers. Nothing legal anyway.

It's hard to find anything that tops Okkervil River in the lyrics department

2010-02-22T22:30:00.000-08:00

Hot breath
rough skin,
warm laughs and smiling,
the loveliest words
whispered and meant
you like all these things.

But, though you like all these things
you love a stone.
You love a stone,
because it's smooth and it's cold.
And you'd love most
to be told
that it's all your own.

You love white veins,
you love hard grey,
the heaviest weight,
the clumsiest shape,
the earthiest smell,
the hollowest tone
you love a stone.

And I'm found too fast,
called too fond of flames,
and then I'm phoning my friends,
and then I'm shouldering the blame,
while you're picking pebbles
out of the drain,
miles ago.
You're out singing songs,
and I'm down shouting names
at the flickerless screen,
going fucking insane.
Am I losing my cool,
overstating my case?
Well, baby what can I say?

You know I never claimed
that I was a stone.
And you love a stone.
You love white veins,
you love hard grey,
the heaviest weight,
the clumsiest shape,
the earthiest smell,
the hollowest tone
you love a stone.

You love a stone,
because it's dark and it's old,
and if it could start
being alive
you'd stop living alone.
And I think I believe that,
if stones could dream,
they'd dream of being laid
side-by-side,
piece-by-piece,
and turned into a castle
for some towering queen
they're unable to know.

And when that queen's daughter
came of age,
I think she'd be lovely
and stubborn and brave,
and suitors would journey
from kingdoms away
just to make themselves known.

And I think that I know the bitter dismay of a lover who brought
fresh bouquets every day
when she turned him away
to remember some knave
who once gave
just one rose, one day, years ago.

One thing I know for certain, I'm pretty sure, It ain't over, I'm not done

2010-02-22T20:44:00.001-08:00

My life feels like My Life again.

2010-02-21T06:59:00.000-08:00

High-five Universe!

Bigfoot lodge with a cute boy. Making out. Fun sex. Bingo! Crying for the last time. Free shots of Fernet. Event Horizon. Puking. Sleeping. Emergency stash of Xanax. Laughing at the ridiculousness of what was the closest thing I had to a romantic situation. Laughing at that guy. Business meeting at Olive Happy Hour. Watermelon martinis. Noeteca. Good wine, amazing food, inappropriate conversation. Random SOMA warehouse party with a swing in the middle of the night. More Event Horizon. More fun sex. Coffee and sandwiches. Toronado all afternoon. Blowing off a party at Grace Cathedral for obvious reasons. It's Always Sunny and metal and making out. More fun sex. Much needed sleep. Waking up this morning and feeling reborn.

As for the other thing, it ended how it began: abruptly and out of nowhere. I'll probably never understand, and that's ok. I can appreciate it for what it was, and most of the time it was great. The. End.

And I looked at the sky, and knew someday I'd die, and then everything would be alright..

2010-02-21T00:08:00.001-08:00

What did you do when you saw that I'd gone
did you stand very still and did tears come falling?

O you want that picture don't you darling
of poor little me standing there bawling?
well it's true that I cried
but then I went outside
and I stood very still in the night
and I looked at the sky
and knew someday I'd die
and then everything would be all right

it's all right
and everything comes
down to this
that everything there ever was
or will be
is all there is

Where did you go once you'd wrote me that note
was a weight lifted off of your shoulders did you fly?

O you want that picture, don't you darling
of heartless cold me
flying not falling?
well, it's true that I soared
but then I went outdoors
and I stood very still in the night
and I looked at the sky
and knew someday I'd die
and then everything would be all right

it's all right
and everything comes
down to this
that everything there ever was
or will be
is all there is

$3000 worth of "Southern Steel"

2010-02-17T15:39:00.000-08:00

Columbidae

2010-02-15T21:30:00.000-08:00

Bonezone?

2010-02-15T20:48:00.001-08:00

(8:46:17 PM) Marie: ok so i'm in the process of setting up dates number 2 and 3 for this week
(8:46:23 PM) Marie: if i respond to this other guy i'll have 4
(8:46:24 PM) Marie: ha
(8:46:36 PM) Chris: jaysus
(8:46:41 PM) Chris: don't get raped
(8:46:59 PM) Marie: dudes should be scared of me raping them
(8:47:05 PM) Chris: they are

JOKES

Blue Valentines

2010-02-15T12:28:00.001-08:00

Valentines Day has never been a day that's meant much to me, whether
I'm in a relationship or not. The only memory I even seem to have
attached to February 14th is that it was the day I was supposed to
move back to San Diego from New Jersey and instead got stuck in a
blizzard in Philadelphia and had to stay there overnight. So a pretty
miserable memory.
Growing up I would sometimes celebrate the Roman Lupercalia,
though in a more symbolic way than an actual Roman-style celebration.
Back in "Roman times" males would run around whipping women to ensure
marriage and fertility. I suppose I did get pretty damn whipped this
year, but figuratively, not in the super fun kinky way.
I sort of always figured I would end up exactly where I am and being
right is always nice. I'm really fucking grateful for my friends,
every single one of whom came through for me in any way they could. On
the way home from getting absolutely wasted with Chris and Josh, I
found a white dove hanging out on the sidewalk. It was obviously
someone's pet because it was very tame and it couldn't fly. All its
flight feathers had been clipped. I was pretty sad I couldn't take it
with me and in my drunk state was sure it was going to get hit by a
car and die. I'm used to my dreams being ridiculously symbolic, but
fuck if I've ever had my life be.

PONY SHOTS: To "just fucking"!

2010-02-08T23:42:00.000-08:00

If anyone gave me this, I might be forced to swoon.

It would be a mild swooning though. I'm all better.

The Bone Zone is being updated again. MAGANRORD is getting a shit ton of attention. It's pretty damn exciting. It's also made me busy as fuck. I like it.

Minutiae

2010-01-29T14:40:00.000-08:00

MAGANRORD

2010-01-20T22:17:00.000-08:00

We've launched our bird blog. It is epic. And metal. And brutal as fuck.

My Morning Run (Steps at 15th and Kirkham)

2010-01-15T11:25:00.000-08:00

I went back to San Diego for Xmas.

2010-01-08T23:52:00.000-08:00

Presented in reverse-chronological order. For the rest, check my flickr

New Terrarium

2009-12-14T21:27:00.000-08:00

So I went to Stow Lake and collected some specimens for new terrariums this past weekend. This is the new one I made:

I also added new plants to these two old ones:

I still have some moss and tiny plants left, I just need to get more jars. I'm pretty happy with how the collection is growing.

In other news, Logan and I have started a blog about the various wildlife found on the island. It's going to be awesome and has the most black metal name ever, which Charles came up with: Maganrord. Marie + Logan + Rock + Bird. Pseudo non sequitur for the win! I'll link it here once we get it all pretty.

Post 2: People & Food

2009-12-05T18:36:00.000-08:00

So one night Logan, Danielle, Micah, and I went to the Knockout to play bingo after pregaming at Pi. Riiiiidiculous things ensued. Which you can see captured on film by clicking this picture:

Also there's a picture of Johnny in the set. NOM.

Then Chris and Josh came over and we all had Thanksgiving together. I made roasted cornish game hen and a shit ton of other delicious things. Check it all out by clicking on my delicious-looking plate of food:

A few days later I made this amazing pot pie with some of the leftovers:

It contained roasted asparagus, brussel sprouts, onion, potatoes, zucchini, and mushrooms, along with peas and broccoli, and all of the meat from a leftover game hen, in a homemade chicken velouté sauce, topped with homemade pastry dough. It was so much better than you can even imagine.

Post 1: Nature

2009-12-05T18:21:00.000-08:00

So I was going to do separate posts for each series of photos I have from the various things I've been doing but honestly, it's too much of a pain. So this one will be about nature.

First I went hiking at the ruins of the Sutro Baths and then went and hung out in Sutro Heights Park. Click the image to check out the set on Flickr:

A week later I went birdwatching/hiking in various areas. I walked from the Golden Gate Bridge across Crissy Field to the Palace of Fine Arts and then took the bus down to Golden Gate Park and went to Stow Lake. Click for the Flickr set:

Yesterday I was at Stow Lake. I saw a weird juvenile gull with grey/white legs:

Discovered that Mew Gulls:

will hover in the air in front of you and catch food that you throw in the air to them.
And saw one of the Great Blue Herons:

And last, but definitely not least, we've had a Peregrine Falcon hanging out on the island for the past week or so. It is awesome.

More pictures of it here.

Land's End

2009-11-21T12:16:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to go hiking at least once a week. Last weekend I went to Land's End. It's part of the GGNRA, the National Park site that Alcatraz is also part of, and it's completely awesome and beautiful.

The full set of pictures is here.

BONE ZONE

2009-11-20T22:08:00.001-08:00

My sister and I started a new blog, Welcome to the Bone Zone, based on inside jokes and stupidity and hilariousness and us talking about how much we need to get laid. I think it's pretty funny. Check it out.

Terrariums, 3 weeks later

2009-11-16T21:39:00.000-08:00

From this:

to this:

This:

to this:

This:

to this:

And this:

to this:

(The little plant actually went through it's entire life cycle and then died. At one point it was so tall I had to take out the cork and let it grow out of the top.)

I've been..

2009-11-16T16:41:00.000-08:00

getting back into cooking and crafting recipes in a MAJOR way lately. Here are some pictures from this past week:

Pear, Plum & Ginger tartlet.

Stuffed Acorn Squash

Ratatouille

Update Post #2: Hike from Ocean Beach to Stow Lake

2009-11-14T11:26:00.000-08:00

So the day after Garrett left I decided to take the train down to Ocean Beach and then hike my way home through Golden Gate Park. It was an amazingly beautiful and warm day and a fantastic way to spend a few hours.

The swells at the beach were huge and moving very very fast. It was awesome.

These little jelly things were everywhere on the sand. No idea what exactly they are.

Kelp and sea foam.

Dead sea lion. It was pretty small, maybe 3-4 feet and something had stolen its head.

There is a great group of ravens, or an "unkindness" if you will, that live at Ocean Beach. I see them around the park and the Sunset all the time. They love to hang out on these lights along Great Highway, and this one totally succeeded in scaring off the gull who was trying to share it with him. (I have the whole incident in series in the album on Flickr)

There were so many mushrooms growing under this tree. Back in my pagan days I'm sure I would have thought that fairies lived there or something.

Dead gopher at Stow Lake.

Dirty tree sex behind South Lake.

Oh! The best part of this hike is when I totally discovered the gay cruising spot in the park. I saw a random trail and decided to follow it. As I'm just going into it, I see this sort of business-casual dressed guy walk by. I thought it was a little weird but kept following the trail into this much more heavily wooded area, full of large thickets of bushes and trees. This old guy passes me in a cardigan and khakis. Thought it was weird that I kept getting passed by all these men who were definitely not dressed for a hike through the park. Then I see a guy standing ahead of me, but facing away, in this sort of clearing through some trees and I think "Huh, that guy looks like he's taking a leak, maybe I should stop and wait until he's done" and as I'm thinking this another old guy just pops out of some bushes to my right and starts walking away while buttoning up his cardigan. Then it all comes together and I say "OH MY GOD" out loud and start laughing, and immediately turn around and walk away, still laughing. It was amazing.

Update Post #1: Garrett Comes to Visit

2009-11-14T11:10:00.000-08:00

So I've really been slacking on shoving my rad life down all of your throats. This is where I get back on that.

I took a few days off last weekend because I was supposed to go to Houston with my mom and sister to visit family. That of course didn't work out, because trying to plan anything with my family is an exercise is futility and ridiculousness, so Garrett came up and visited me instead. We had a much more mellow time than we did the last time he was up here, but it was still huge amounts of fun. Plus I made him gourmet breakfasts everyday, which got me waaaay back into cooking in a major way, so I'm happy.

Dragged him to bingo on Thursday, so that we could both drool over Johnny the hot bartender. He ended up winning and got this fantastic alligator.

In front of Saints Peter and Paul Church in North Beach. I walked him from Market and Kearny, up through Chinatown and North Beach, over to Pier 39, and then back down to Market later that night. We hit up some bars along the way and played tourist.

Sitting in my kitchen, eating breakfast burritos I made using homemade refried beans.

We spent a lot of time just hanging out in bed, talking and cracking each other up. Those are the best times.

As promised...

2009-11-09T22:04:00.000-08:00

the full files for the songs from "Ships & Seas" in a 70MB .rar file.

1. Bonnie "Prince" Billy - My Home is the Sea
2. Okkervil River - Lost Coastlines
3. Nick Cave - Pinery Boy
4. Dead Man's Bones - Paper Ships
5. Bonnie "Prince" Billy - Is it the Sea?
6. The Long Winters - The Commander Thinks Aloud
7. Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism
8. Okkervil River - A Girl in Port
9. Bonnie "Prince" Billy & Matt Sweeney - Death in the Sea
10. Rufus Wainwright & Kate McGarrigle - Lowlands Away

Ships & Seas

2009-11-09T06:42:00.001-08:00

My newest "mixtape":

Inspired by a night on a ship on the bay. It was beautiful.
I'll put all the actual tracks up on here later this week.

Oh November..

2009-11-03T19:28:00.000-08:00

aren't you off to such a great start? Sigh.

Sunday night was the first time I've hated this city. I got better though.

I do hate this new time. The days go by so fast and the nights seem to drag on forever. I used to love the dark but right now all I want is sun and running around outside and being in nature. It doesn't help that all of a sudden we're in the middle of full-fledged summer weather up here.

Garrett will be here tomorrow night and then I've got 4 days off, on 3 of which I will be hanging out with him. I hope the weather lasts through then. We will have epic hikes and beaches and exploration and adventure.

Oh yeah....

2009-10-29T13:15:00.000-07:00

I saw Dead Man's Bones the other night. It was basically amazing. If
you weren't there you should be super jealous.

Green goodness

2009-10-28T21:04:00.001-07:00

So I've been making terrariums like mad for the past few days. Right now I'm using very special found materials to make them, instead of buying plants, but I can't say where I'm getting the plants/bones from because it's super top secret. But I will show you pictures.

Random terrarium inspiration links:
This guy's flickr.
The Fern and Mossery.
Pitcher plant terrarium on a great botany/horticulture blog.
Design Sponge: Found Terrariums.
SFGate article: Gardening Under Glass.

Songs of the Morning

2009-10-25T11:19:00.000-07:00

This is right where I'm at today. Listen to get there too.

Breakfast

2009-10-24T12:44:00.000-07:00

Sliced fingerling potatoes and mushrooms sauteed in butter, garlic, and herbes de provance and then scrambled with eggs. Finished with fresh mint and crumbled chevre.

Be jealous.

My day in camera-phone pictures

2009-10-19T19:49:00.000-07:00